Let me be myself a bit

Let me melt myself a bit
Let me relieve myself a bit
Let me unleash myself a bit
Let me be myself a bit...

My heart was loaded, in fact overloaded
with rocks of regrets and also guilts
of my past's mistakes and misdeeds,
with this useless load how could it proceed,
But O Guruji! it's by your grace so full
I've removed that cart, and i'm no longer a bull;
I've melted myself a bit
I've relieved myself a bit
I've unleashed myself a bit
I've become myself a bit...

My mind had become a pile of garbage
a putrid corner of filthy thoughts accumulated with age,
rare good thoughts were rendered shrouded
in the dump of dirty ones that always followed,
But you must have blossomed in that mud for sure
it's no stench since the day it became yours;
I've cleaned myself a bit
I've relieved myself a bit
I've unleashed myself a bit
I've become myself a bit...

My character constituted all dubiousness
furbished with the jewels of lies, lust and arrogance,
sans any compassion, rather replete with enviousness
an identity with 'the ego' was my characteristic helplessness,
but the fire of Your grace has burnt that falseness
and the light is showing the heavenly belongingness,
I've burnt my falseness a bit
I've relieved myself a bit
I've unleashed myself a bit
I've become myself a bit...

  

My existence was defined, but in fact confined,

by ignorant people around, with their believes unrefined,

my vision was made restricted to their narrow religion 

where every preach was alien, and nothing was mine

I had to accept them, Or nobody would be benign;

Who am I? was totally forgotten 

until when you lit that flame of wisdom

where I could see myself in a vast extension;

since then

I've opened myself a bit

I've relieved myself a bit

I've unleashed myself a bit

I've become myself a bit

and Let me be myself a bit...

The Pain of Ecstasy

A wave of rejoice has suddenly arisen

like a wave in the ocean which is

unaware of its source

moving towards an unfamiliar destination,

unbothered for its past

and for its future too

even for the direction it's heading to;

It doesn't depend on anybody to grow

neither it cares anybody to wait for,

because it's just a wave,

its nature is to Rise, Dance, Move

and at last to lose itself into its source again.

This cycle is inevitable..

A Law of Existence.

But this time it has got aberrant.

This time it's a wave of Love in my life,

It bore for someone, arose, danced

attained its peak of bliss

and then what?

The inevitable end?

Wait...

It's an exception.

It refuses to!

It's going Insane

and neglecting its end.

How can one evade its own nature?

It has to lose itself, and become the ocean again

But something is wrong with it.

It's clinging to its smaller identity

Of a wave, and not of an Ocean,

It's making the journey painful,

creating unnecessary trouble for itself,

creating an unheard pain of ecstasy.

It has to meet its end, willingly or not

because that's what it's meant to.

But it's got a mind to think,

thinking of staying unnaturally

in the state of ecstasy, be it foolishly or meaninglessly...

Poor wave... and foolish attempt.

... and I Love to Die

Beginning of Love marks

the beginning of bliss in life,

it's unforgettable You

who made it possible 'a journey to paradise',

An unheard timeless journey

An unseen movementless journey

An unbelievable blissful journey;

It all began with you

when Tsunami of love left me no rescue,

I recall today that fortunate day

when my days started becoming fortunate;

At a short distance only you were sitting before me

like a goddess of beauty has appeared before its devotee,

then depth of your eyes gave an exquisite surprise

you made it all paradise with 'Jai Gurudev' with smile;

Your candor smile ashamed the splendid sun

and I wondered in No time how sunset happened!

Your melodious words were extolling sermons of bible

with echo inside me stentorian and multiple;

You were unaware of your doings afterwards

preaching something else and effects Opposites,

You were talking about calmness in worldly chaos

but making my inside chaotic in a calm room there,

You were teaching that Smile is the essence of Life

but I was dying each time when you smiled,

You said that God & the world is unending

then why did my world restricted around you?

You told God inside is the source of all bliss

I wondered how my source itself happened to be outside me!

You preached that 'present moment is inevitable'

still I wished it to be escapable

or atleast I could make its end changeable...

I infect realized a strange experience

wanna live and die at the same moment,

also i find myself into an ocean

where I love to die each time I dive

a zero-gravity condition enables me to rise,

swiftly from lowest of my existence

ultimately to Paradise!

And I Love to Die!

Quest of Learning a Universal Language: LOVE

I was unaware of the language

that this existence is finesse at,

A language, sans words,

listened and discerned only by heart,

Why was I oblivious of it, while

entire life-system has this rhetoric art;

When sun appears as a guest in the morning

Its meet inculcates a new joy in every being,

Its rays revitalize everything they touch

a morning ablution whole universe does,

clamoring and chirping of birds is how it’s welcomed,

Dews becoming pearls is how they get enlightened,

The guest and the host both are at cloud nine

An alien esoteric communication, now I recognize;

Clouds at the horizon are real philanderers

whisper their beloved earth

Make plan of the rain, and stay or

Entertain with its VIBGYOR intertwined,

Or just scud across the blues,

Now I can read these all naughty clues,

Refulgent moon looks exquisitely romantic

Titivates the night with its lovely cool-light

Titillates the nocturnal life with highest delight,

Its sneaking in the sky

Clandestine work-style

Could be captured by only a paramour’s eyes;

Love is the only universal language,

I want to learn it

With finesse

And get attuned with my own forgotten family, this world,

Celebrate its culture in its own ways

And get rid of this stultifying oblivion forever.

Yogi Vs Flower